NFL Hot Takes: Week 9 – 2016

Arizona Cardinals: BYE WEEK

Atlanta Falcons: The Falcons offense is averaging 6.8 yards per play, which we haven’t seen since the days of “The Greatest Show on Turf.” The problem is that their defense isn’t going to be able to save them if the offense ever has an off day.

Baltimore Ravens: The Ravens are like the exact opposite of the Falcons – good defense, but somehow have no ability to sustain a drive. 14 out of their 21 points came from a 95 yard touchdown and a blocked punt. This team is exactly what their 4 – 4 record shows… average.


Carolina Panthers: Cam Newton isn’t going to survive very long behind this offensive line. Sure the Rams have a great pass rush, but he’s got to learn to protect himself or get rid of the ball quicker. Also, they shouldn’t be too excited about beating the Rams.

Chicago Bears: BYE WEEK

Cincinnati Bengals: BYE WEEK

Cleveland Browns: We are officially on 0-16 watch. At some point you have to think that Cleveland will start intentionally losing games to secure that #1 draft pick. Or they might have already started doing that, it’s tough to tell.

Dallas Cowboys: Dak Prescott officially encountered his first “Dez Bryant Sideline Blowup” and was able to work through it which automatically qualifies him to be next week’s starter.

Denver Broncos: The defense was banged up, and the offense is without C.J. Anderson – but you can’t go almost an entire half of football without picking up a first down. Now Denver isn’t even in the driver’s seat for a wildcard spot.

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Detroit Lions: I can’t remember the last time that a Lions game didn’t come down to the final seconds – win or lose, which makes them impossible to bet on, but exciting as hell to watch. If you do want to bet, though, visit Sun Bets for the best odds anywhere.

Green Bay Packers: When you have a chance to gain a game in the standings, you can’t get blown out at home against a crappy Colts team. Aaron Rodgers played horribly and the only reason the score seemed close is because he went full on “Blake Bortles” and picked up some garbage time scores. If you can’t tell, that cost me my fantasy matchup.

Houston Texans: BYE WEEK

Indianapolis Colts: As much as we’d like to hate on the Colts for being one of the most under-achieving teams in recent memory; I really just have nothing too bad to say… aside from allowing some late garbage touchdowns to Rodgers that cost me my fantasy matchup.

Jacksonville Jaguars: It’s just so fascinating that with all the high draft picks and free agent signings, Jacksonville can’t seem to make any moves in the right direction. I guess five years of Gus Bradley isn’t the way to go.

Kansas City Chiefs: Travis Kelce deserved to get thrown out, but in all fairness – the ref deserved to have a towel thrown at him because he missed a blatant PI call. In other news, don’t look now but the Chiefs are 6-2 and right in the thick of the AFC Playoff race.

Los Angeles Rams: When your defense allows a total of two touchdowns in their last two games, you’d expect to be 2-0, if not at least 1-1. But then again, this is the Rams we are talking about here. I still can’t think of a valid reason for keeping Goff on the bench at this point.

Miami Dolphins: The Dolphins have figured out that Jay Ajayi is pretty good at running the ball. It’s really too bad that it took them like five weeks to figure that out because they might actually have a winning record and a shot at the playoffs right now.

Minnesota Vikings: We thought it was weird when Norv Turner resigned earlier this week, but after watching the Vikings offense struggle through another week, he made the right decision. It’s kinda the equivalent of moving to Canada to avoid the disaster of the election tomorrow.

New England Patriots: BYE WEEK

New Orleans Saints: When you have a defense as awful as the Saints do, your only option is to put up 40+ points. Good thing nobody in the NFC South really knows how to play defense because it’s making their games somewhat watchable.

New York Giants: It’s not like the Giants exactly went out and won this one – more like the Eagles lost it. Eli continues to throw interceptions late in games that have the potential to cost his team wins, he just got lucky this week.

New York Jets: I never thought I’d see the Jets become more undisciplined after Rex left, but Todd Bowles is making him look like Bill Belichick. I guess when you let Brandon Marshall choose the QB based on who he likes better and not what’s best for the team, there’s not much you can do to keep the rest of the guys in line. This team is the hottest of messes right now.

Oakland Raiders: I have never seen a punter do a celebration dance, but Marquette King was one pelvic thrust away from getting flagged and fined.  Oh, and the Raiders ran the SAME EXACT PLAY 10x in a row and it worked EVERY SINGLE TIME. - Customized NFL Gear

Philadelphia Eagles: As Alex Evans pointed out, it’s not easy to win games when your coach makes bone-headed decisions all game long. Kickers have been historically bad this year, but not as bad as going 1/4 on fourth down when you’re in field goal range.

Pittsburgh Steelers: I wonder how long it will be before the Steelers are laughing about that onside kick. What’s worse is that it really shouldn’t have come down to that but Pittsburgh’s offense was making the Rams look like the 2007 Patriots for 3.5 quarters.

San Diego Chargers: This team is like a sexy Southern California version of the Detroit Lions, which depending on the week could be either a huge compliment or a huge insult.

San Francisco 49ers: It’s one thing to see that the Niners have the worst rushing defense on paper, but it’s entirely different seeing it in “action” on the field. I know it’s cliche, but you can’t help but feel like any Joe off the street could rush for 100 against SF.

Seattle Seahawks: MONDAY NIGHT GAME

Tampa Bay Buccaneers: Tampa Bay going for two and almost killing their QB when down by 20 late in the fourth quarter is a microcosm of the Buc’s season. This team desperately needs Doug Martin to return to the field because as good as Jameis can be, he’s not equipped to air it out 50 times a game.

Tennessee Titans: For as good as Mariota played yesterday, he also single-handedly lost the game for the Titans with two turnovers that got returned for 14 points. Teams like Tennessee aren’t built to overcome turnovers.

Washington Redskins: BYE WEEK

About Aaron Garcia

Aaron is an avid sports fan who passionately follows the NFL, NBA and MLB, in addition to NCAA Sports. He is an Arizona State University grad who loves the Dodgers and the Patriots.